 A Wait May Be Too Late |
 Mar 27 2010, 04:38 AM
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 Roamin' Reader Forum Moderator  Group: Authors Posts: 2,257 Joined: 22-August 05 From: B.C. Canada Member No.: 183  |
A Wait May Be Too Late
By Trab The bubbles of the swirl pool stroked Ken’s skin like faint remembrances of Todd’s fingers, so many years ago. He could remember the love in each trace, and once again feel the passion for his love; a passion that would never be fulfilled. He held on for another moment of bliss, till his father pulled him out of his reverie and back to the stark reality of his endless barren existence. If only he had said something to his parents before it was too late. If only he hadn’t decided to wait. Carefully Steven pulled his son into the lift sling, to get him back into the wheelchair to take him home. He missed his son’s zest for life, and even though he loved his son with all his heart, he sometimes wondered if saving his life to a lifetime of being paralyzed and mute had really been the right thing to have done. However, he knew his love for Ken would endure forever, and was sure Ken basked in every minute of it. © Copyright, Trab, 2010. -------------------- Criticism from a fool is no criticism at all.
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Mar 27 2010, 02:39 PM
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 A Bear of very little brain Group: Authors Posts: 786 Joined: 8-January 08 From: Westcountry, England, UK Member No.: 7,140 |
Oh Trab, what a wonderful flash.
This is a piece that achieves what flash fiction is almost uniquely capable of - it makes you think, raises a host of questions, forces you to reason, to consider possibilities, to decide on moral imperatives. Where is Todd now? If Ken had come out to his parents before the accident, perhaps Steven's boundless love for his son would have prompted him to consider his needs and to find Todd and bring the two of them together again if possible. Or did Todd die in the accident? --------------------  Symbol of Appreciation awarded by DesDownunder for 'Boys Grave'. I'm very proud and honoured to have it. |
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Mar 27 2010, 04:53 PM
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 Prodigious Dude Group: Authors Posts: 2,169 Joined: 2-December 06 Member No.: 500 |
What I love is the disconnect between two people, the father and son, who both misinterpret the other. Stark reality, played out on a small screen.
Wonderfully done. C |
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Mar 28 2010, 02:42 PM
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 Author Group: Authors Posts: 197 Joined: 9-September 05 From: Virginia USA Member No.: 185 |
I agree completely, and would just add that achieving the disconnect and making it plain to the reader within the brief window of flash fiction is genius indeed. Great job, Trab. James -------------------- Honored to display the Des Downunder Appreciation Award for my poem "Surface Tension" |
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Jun 15 2010, 11:10 PM
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#5
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 Group: Members Posts: 308 Joined: 6-August 08 From: Minneapolis, MN Member No.: 7,454 |
Truly amazing impact in such a small space, Trab.
Thanks for reminding me of everything I love about words. Tracy |
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